workingfortheman.com

I mainly took the job at the coffee lab to get off unemployment - it was almost time for me to meet my counselor to show all the jobs I had supposedly been looking for, and I wanted to avoid that like the plague. I never expected that I would learn so many life lessons from one little job and the two lovely ladies who were my bosses.

Lesson 1: There is a right way and a wrong way to put spoons in a drawer.

"You got the wrong size spoons," boss #1 said, a recent graduate eight years my junior said. "We need plastic soup spoons, not teaspoons."

Fair enough. I went back to the supply room to exchange the offensive spoons for their almost identical but slightly larger siblings, and emptied the box into the spoon drawer.

"You didn't put the spoons in the drawer right," boss #1 now said. "But don't worry. You'll learn how we do things here."

Lesson 2: There is a right way and a wrong way to do everything else.

During my painful 7 weeks in the coffee lab, I learned the proper way to open a bag (the top must be folded over twice, like cuffs on pants), the proper way to put bubble wrap in a box, the right way to open a box, the right implement to use to cut paper, the right time to order supplies (about 6 weeks before you ran out. Why wait till the last minute?) and the proper technique for tasting coffee with a spoon. My most excellent bosses never tried to corrupt my creativity by telling me the proper methods before I tried to cut, sip, or open various containers. They let me explore on my own, only correcting me after I had chosen the wrong path of opening, cutting or sipping.

Lesson 3: Anyone can move a mountain.

"I want you to go downstairs and pick up a 100 lb. bag of sugar, and two giant water cooler bottles," boss #1 said. (I should add that I am not going to Sydney for weight lifting. I am a very short, chubby woman, with no arm strength whatsoever. But I will never forget her never ending belief in me and my physical prowess.)

Lesson 4: The business of America is business.

I was privileged to work in a company so dedicated to hard work. I'll never forget the concentration my bosses showed when they tried to determine their personality types for the company personality type workshop, or the effort they put into determining their goals, weaknesses, strengths, or the bonding they showed when they spent hours talking about their dates and marriages. And I'll always be grateful for the day off (Unpaid!) I had to take when I was not allowed to be in my office unattended while the permanent employees spent all day watching a speech by Ted Turner in the cafeteria.

Lesson 5: Bosses are psychic.

"You did not work until 4:30 on Tuesday," boss #2 said, as she perused my time card.

"You were out that day," I pointed out. "How do you know what time I left?"

"You'll have to be real strict about your time," she replied.

"You said I didn't have to, to just give myself 35 hours a week."

"Well, don't do it next week," she grumbled.

Fortunately, I didn't have to. I got fired for calling in sick.

After being fired from the coffee lab, Kim got another temp job the next day. Fifteen months later, she's still there and still a temp.

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